Our Reality Show…

Months ago, Becky said we should just get our own reality show.  Two chicks, cancer, a custody situation and pow! five children instead of two.  Plus, as she pointed out, the fact that this is my first relatioinship with a woman would just make it funnier…or stranger, whichever works!

So, there was Jon and Kate plus 8, that 19 children and counting thing (or are they up to 22 children, by now?), and Becky and I sit here, lacking a title.

How does one summarize, in a catchy preferably rhyming way: two women, five children, three dogs, one cat, and countless fish?  Any ideas?   And let’s not forget the cancer, the chemo, and the endless ex parte hearings…  Becky says seven is her lucky number (which she wants to explain right now, so I’ll humor her: seven letters in her first name, seven letters in her last name, born on the seventh day, in the seventh astrological sign — to a woman born on the seventh day of the seventh month).  If I forgot any sevens there, they will have to kiss my butt.  And now, in the biped department, there are seven of us.  So she says, “Seven is Heaven” as her title suggestion.  I have promptly made fun of it, as I am pretty sure that there was a sickeningly saccharine show on the WB called “Seventh Heaven.”  We are definitely not raising Pastor’s kids here (which should tell you I have watched that show I just made fun of).  We are some sort of combination of Dukes of Hazzard, Two and Half Men, Little House on the Prairie (that must be because of me) and Mortal Kombat.

Titles, anyone?  I like to think of it as “My Short Journey to the Mental Hospital.”  Becky thinks we should go with my question in the health food store yesterday: “Is there any organic hard liquor?!”  (By the way, if you try to shop, tally your total, think, and be followed around by five comedians you will start looking for the hard liquor too.) 🙂

I try for song lyrics to inspire me, but that’s just a mess.  Othello likes to sing “Simple Man” to me, Primo constantly sings “Detachable Penis,” while the other three are stuck on ABBA and Lady Gaga.  Who can hear past all of that?

Any recommendations would be greatly appreciated.  Since I am home, attempting to gain weight, I may as well write my pitch for the networks and be as silly as possible!

Happy Sunday, and blessings to you all…

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