Okay, not a song lyric or title today. In fact, it’s a nod to some Greek literature I studied in University.
Since February I have been doing a different kind of work than what I was accustomed to: no high heels and professional attire, just working on me, my health, my family. As if that wasn’t challenge enough, I had a few other obstacles on my way to the exact place I needed to be.
Overall, I would say that I have done well. But I have observed that there are people in life who really bring stress and/or negativity to the big picture of life. I decided before I began chemo that I would have peace and love surrounding me throughout this process, and I took steps (and still do) to ensure that the peace and love are not disrupted.
Yesterday rolled around, and brought with it a fair portion of people being “silly,” for lack of any better term. I live in a bubble at this point, according to one of my friends. I prefer to think of it as an island. Only those people who matter the VERY most are on the island. It will probably never go back to what it was: I had crowded it with people who have barely once bothered to ask how I am doing through my treatment as they are so entrenched in their own drama; people who tried to wrestle control from me when it came to my health (gotta love those HMOs haha); and those people who made my cancer, my health, all about them. Those people are gone, for the most part. Once in a while, they try to put in a quick appearance, somewhat like being an extra who simply walks across the scene quickly and says nothing of any meaning or significance.
This morning I realized that I am scarier than all of those people. I used to know quite a few braggarts, but I cannot think of a single one of them who could have made it this far without breaking. I am NOT breaking. I am THRIVING.
Today is session 5, and all I can say to this chemo and cancer and life stuff is:
Blessings to you all, I hope you all take some names if you need to today…