The Buck Stops Here!

Yesterday was designated for Tuesday Thoughts. I’ll get to those. Meanwhile, I’m thinking if I can’t use my blog as a soapbox, then what on earth else can I use?! For the most part, my social media experience is set up for positivity – when I find someone spouting negativity on a consistent basis, I try to “change the channel.” Sometimes, it’s far too easy to get caught up in someone else’s mess(es), rather than dealing with my own. It’s a change I’ve tried to implement since I had cancer.
There are many “old ways” that I have tried to change. I used to say that “Superwoman” was alive and well and living here at my house. The cost for that was a bit higher than I was prepared to pay, so now I work hard to prioritize.
Another “old way” that was a terribly bad habit? The blame game. I don’t mean that I placed blame on others: I was a doormat. I took blame and responsibility where I shouldn’t have. It’s a very negative kind of egoism, in my opinion.

With all of that, I can safely say to everyone the following words: PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY!

Is there something in your life that isn’t working for you? Change your habits, write out the situation (in case you’re like me and can’t see the forest for the trees at times), or simply walk away.
Is it love that is failing you? It’s not love. Love doesn’t fail. Love is. That’s just it: it is. It’s simple and confusing. Love is working through things together. If love is hurting you (literally) run like hell!
Are you disappointed in your relationships with friends or family or your children? The only area you can effect positive changes is in yourself. You are ONLY responsible for nurturing your side of the relationship, not for trying to make the other person nurture it. Believe me, I spent years trying to build a bridge between my daughter and her bio-dad: he wouldn’t make a single effort. Now she’s a young lady, not a child, and I find myself in the extremely odd position of respecting that it is her relationship. It made me realize that I am NOT responsible for their relationship (or the complete lack thereof). I am only responsible for me and my own relationships. If you think about this for a few moments, you may find it liberating. (Warning: it took me a LONG time to feel that sense of liberation.)

There are old thorns in my side that were entirely within my power to change. Change can be terrifying, change can be painful, but it is a reflection of our choices and actions and habits as well. It’s our own miracle that we can get up when we are knocked down, and find a new approach.

Life is too short to struggle. And, as my Dad says, Life is simple, but people screw it up.

Random rant, I know. I am pretty much chalking it up to politics, finding out a friend is sick, and the wild emotions roiling around inside of me. 🙂 This post wasn’t meant as a lecture, by the way, more of a call to arms. Let’s do this thing called life, and make it what each of us wants!

Blessings and energy to you all…

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